On forgiveness

My mom and I haven't spoken in years. I've lost count of how many. There has been a lot of hurt, a lot of lies, and just a lack of "healthy" in our relationship. But you know what's funny? When I think of her, I still remember the good times. I remember going to the beach with her growing up, and how much fun it was. I remember going to aerobics classes together and laughing so hard at each others lack of coordination that we couldn't speak. I remember sleeping in her bed until I was way too old. I like to think of the good in her, and not the bad. And the other day it dawned on me that this is how Jesus sees me. Sure, He knows what I have done and He knows my thoughts, but He loves me just the same. And He forgives me.  He sees the good in me. The bad is there, but its not magnified. And if I let Him, He will use the bad for good. 

So this year, I'm working on forgiving my Mom. Not because she does or doesn't deserve it, but because that's what I'm called to do. Extend compassion where He has shown me compassion. Extend grace where He has shown me grace. My mom may never even know that I have forgiven her, but I'm doing it anyway. I'm choosing grace.  I'm choosing love. Because its what Jesus did for me. 

Love is a verb

Yesterday when I dropped Abbie off at school, I realized it was bike day for her class. All of her friends had brought their bikes but I had missed the memo.  She looked a little sad but didn’t say anything. I hugged her goodbye and as soon as I left the school I knew I needed to go get hers. So I went home, got the bike, and brought it back to her school. When I walked in with it she was SO excited. She gave me a huge hug, said thank you, showed all of her friends, and then went over to one of her best friends and said “Don’t you wish you lived at my house??!”

My heart melted. And then and there I realized that I can tell my children and my husband I love them all day long (and I do),  but showing them that I love them? Wow, what an impact.